Bugger.

Well, I haven't lost any weight, I've withdrawn from the London Marathon and I feel bloated and horrible.

However, I am also making some positive changes. No more pressure on myself to run, for example. I'm not enjoying it, so I'm not going to do it. I'll run if I am in the gym and I feel like running on a treadmill, and I'll only do a few miles, if I can.

I plan to use the gym far more, because I can now see my weight affecting my health. I can also see that part of this is drinking heavily, which I only really do A) when I'm not getting any exercise and B) when the moon is fucking with me. And the only way to handle B is to exercise, so that's two birds with one stone.

I thought, next week, I shall go to the gym every day and see how it feels. Rotate what I am exercising (not physically, you understand) so I don't tire, and see what happens. One morning cardio, and maybe a swim at lunch; next morning upper body weights; next morning cardio and leg weights. You see? It means I won't spend hours there, which has stopped me going in the past (I love working out for 2 hours+ – it's immensely satisfying) because I have thought I won't have time. I'll be there for 70 - 80 minutes at most, and I'll enjoy it too.

The pressure's off, and I just aim to get back to what I enjoy doing – exercising for the sake of it, and see what happens. It should help quell the urge to booze, and help psychologically with the lunar cycle – and if I get those two things in hand, my weight will come down of its own accord. So we'll see how the next week goes, for certainly in psychological terms, I have been beating myself up a bit of late.