Wednesday 2 July 2014

Z looks at her ribs

Ironic that it's taken my husband's weight loss to give me xylophone ribs after all.

He's lost an alarming amount of weight this year.  He'd lost about a stone in the six or nine months before I last wrote, but in the last few months he dropped from about 10 1/2 stone to under 9 stone.  Since he'd been a normal, healthy weight at the start, the first 15 pounds made him pretty slim, but now he's gaunt and emaciated.  He's had tests - blood tests, a chest x-ray and an abdominal CT scan and nothing dreadful has shown up - I know they were looking for bowel cancer, but they didn't find it.  It doesn't mean that it's impossible he has a small tumour somewhere (nor that it's likely, on the other hand) but he hasn't got the major cancer that seemed to be indicated.  That's wonderful news, though there is plainly something wrong, we don't yet know what.

Anyway, it's not appetite inducing, finding myself the bigger eater of the two of us.  He does have a very good breakfast, but I've gone completely off breakfast over the past week and haven't been able to face anything most days.  I do eat lunch and dinner, but what I eat is rather random.  I might eat the same as he does, but I'm doing him whatever he fancies and, if I don't feel like it, I do something else for myself.  For a couple of days, I had a big globe artichoke for lunch - delicious, and I had it with butter,  but there's no substance to it.  I've also been eating quite a lot of Twiglets, which I love - I ate a 105g packet in a day and a half - but they were meal substitutes (at least one of the meals was breakfast).  I have been making and eating cake, because he can sometimes be tempted by cake or ice cream.

A few weeks ago, I found up a very old, red skirt that had been languishing in the back of a cupboard for years.  It is M&S, size 10 and must be quite 25 years old.  Size 10 then is smaller than a size 8 now - that is, the hips are about the same but the waist is smaller.  I tried it on last week and could barely do it up, though it fitted round the hips.

This morning, I weighed myself and found I'd lost a few pounds and was about 8 stone 4.  This surprised me, I would find it incredibly hard to lose about 5 pounds in a month, never mind a week.  But I'm never one to miss an opportunity, so I went to find the skirt (which I'd washed) and tried it on and the waist did up easily.  I ironed it and I'm wearing it now.  When I went to get the iron, I found a couple more skirts waiting to be ironed that I'd forgotten I had - I've been wondering why my summer wardrobe was so sparse.

So, I've hit a 25-ish year low.  Not for the right reasons and I don't necessarily want to be this low a weight - I'm not thin but I am slender and I feel that under 8 stone would be too thin.  I must try to keep eating a bit more - I think it's been worry, mostly, though.

Having said all that, I must do something about dinner.  I've got some salmon, left over from last night.  R wants it as it is, I might add a bit to an omelette - depends on how much he takes.  I've picked some spinach to go with it.  I was given a meringue filled with cream to bring home.  Random snacking suits me nicely right now.