Friday 25 January 2008

Waisting away

I'd wondered if it's wishful thinking, because in the last three or four years manufacturers have been making waistbands much larger - I suppose that, after years of wearing low-slung clothes, most girls don't have waists any more - if you look, they go straight down like a boy. I don't. I'm too old for a muffin-top to look cute, if it ever does.

Anyway, today I wore a skirt that's about six or seven years old (which doesn't count as old at all in my wardrobe) and it had been getting decidedly snug. Now it isn't. It's loose.

On the other hand, one always has an offspring to keep one in order. I arrived home a few minutes after Ro yesterday. "Was that you I passed on your bike?" he asked. I admitted it. He was toasting three lemon and raisin Scotch Pancakes. I eyed them hungrily. "Ooh, time for a crumpet, I think!" I murmured and slapped one on the other side of the Aga (an Aga is the best cooker in the world for toasting, it can do loads All At Once). "You still on that diet?" he enquired..."How does that work then?" ...looking at the crumpet critically. I explained haughtily that it works by my eating it plain without any butter. And by making porridge with half milk, half water, and eating that plain too. "But don't you find you need to snack?" he asked. "My friends find they're so hungry that they eat packets of crisps." I waxed enthusiastic about ricecakes [17 calories each!!(!)] and raw vegetables.

Afterwards, I checked the pancake and crumpet packets. 3 pancakes at 95 calories each (subsequently buttered) versus 1 crumpet at 70 calories.

Stick thin, the child is. Fuck.

2 comments:

badgerdaddy said...

Never met him, but hate his thin-ness. Pah and pah again.

Pah.

Z said...

You are so right. I mean, Al is thin enough, but at least he has the grace to eat junk food once in a while.

Pah.