It makes for disturbing reading.

Well, the scales arrived. I'm not totally sure about their accuracy, but I say that because I live in an incredibly old building and there are simply no flat surfaces. Tomorrow I will try them on the ground floor and see if there is any difference.

So, the scales purport to assess weight, body fat, total water/hydration, muscle mass, and bone density/volume or something.

I set them up as per the instructions; interestingly, there are two types of body profile you can choose: normal person, male or female, or athlete, male or female. An athlete is defined as someone doing 11 or more hours of intense physical activity a week. I'm probably only doing about five at the moment, unless you count dog walking, which it probably doesn't. We do walk quite fast though, and there are lots of hills...

I think I am somewhere between the two, so I set up a profile for each type, and the measurements are quite different.

Shit, too.

Anyway, I digress. This was always intended as a balls-out post, let it all hang out and hide nothing. So here we go.

First setting, as normal person:
Weight: 16st 4.8lbs (229, US Fat Fans)
Body fat: 33.3% (as perfect a third as you'll find. Who knew? This, of course, makes me obese)
TBW (water): 37.8 (this is actually 10 points below where it should be apparently, but as I have spent the first half of 2013 drunk, I think this is understandable)
Muscle: 38.7% (yay! This one is ok!)
Bone: 5.2lbs (this sounds incredibly low to me - and according to their ranges, it is, as for my weight it should be more like 7.5lbs)

Then again, as an athlete:
Weight: Same
Fat: 28.8% (4.5% better!)
Water: 42.5 (a lot better but still low)
Muscle: 42.1 (six percent below what is 'unacceptable')
Bone: 6.2lb (much better - still low though)

In a nutshell, I am fucking fat, and fucking muscular. Now to work on that fat part; gym sign up is at the weekend, probably Sunday, and Saturday I have a run planned for 60-80 minutes, I'll see how I go. Then next week, we swim, and run.

I have also just been shopping, largely with breakfast in mind. I bought a few tins of fish, and some smoked mackerel, plus some carrots, oranges, and eggs. I've found that on days when I get my breakfast right, everything else falls into place. My ideal breakfast is quite protein heavy, with a mackerel fillet or two, a couple of hard boiled eggs, and an orange. That really keeps me full and it's all stuff I like eating, and takes no preparation, as long as the eggs are cooked in advance. Having carrots around makes snacking easy too; I have bought some dark chocolate from Aldi, but it's the stuff where it's in five smaller bars, and they're very slim and small. Works for me.

So, that's the plan. Your thoughts?